Jan. 31, 2011
But how could you, with these titles and lead story lines? In an attempt to grab your attention, some reporters come up with titles that attract you in to read the story, or just make you go "Huh?" Most of these stories are informative and valid news. And then there are some...
Gives "up your nose" a whole new dimension for medical research!
So, we need a vaccine to protect giant marines?
Mr. Potato Head joins the Mafia?
Like moths to a bug zapper...
So maybe some good things did come out of Chernobyl?
Most were from that person who has lots of money they want to transfer to your bank account.
Who actually wanted to eat "Toxic Waste Nuclear Sludge Chew Bars" anyway?
Jobs bill for Chicago?
"Infertility researchers in Israel have found a 15-minute encounter with a clown immediately after fertility treatment dramatically increased the chances of a successful pregnancy."
Could they achieve the same effect with Three Stooges episodes, and would exposure to mimes be a negative factor?
Does this make TP'ing a house qualify for a home energy tax credit?
A modern version of reading entrails.
But can the mouse do karaoke singing?
Maybe if the Japanese mouse sang to them, it would cheer them up.
Maybe they just need to learn how to sing.
Remember to leave the singing mouse at home.
It just wanted a warm snack!
First, start toaster oven, then become hero. And blame the dog.
Make sure your bee is rested before the prom.
For real! So, investigate your lunch first before you eat it, there might be scientific paper waiting there.
Suggestion for the White House.
Maybe it was just the chili they ate before the match?
Hunting via Geiger counter...
Unless he's radioactive.
Apparently he even rations fashion.
One would think the answer is obvious.
Memo to self: cancel ocean cruise.
Simple formula, but poor marketing.
Did the Earth say "excuse me"?
Another stimulus program
There are monkey annoyance experts??